Today, August 18th marks the ONE YEAR I've been single. It's weird, knowing that this day last year I was crying my eyes out. I made it one year without dating anyone else because, no matter how much I deny it or lie to myself, I still love him. I don't know why and I can't help it. If I could, id be over it. Done. Moved on. But its not that simple. Feelings are involved. True feelings. My life changed because of him and I can't just forget about it. I cant forget about how he made me feel or the confidence he gave me. I love him regardless of the pain he caused me. I know he's probably moved on. Done thinking about me. He doesn't love me anymore and that's a hard thing to come by. But EVERYTIME I hear his name, smell his cologne, see a truck like his, or see a cute couple, I think of him. I remember every good feeling. Never the bad. We watched the sunrise together one morning at the lake and it was then, that moment while he held my hands and looked into my eyes that I loved him with everything I had. The fact that that all ended mindbottles me. I know I can't make him love me again or even care but I just wish things were easier.
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